Watts (chipotle) wrote,

Road poetry

So I was driving around yesterday. I sat at a rest stop along I-75 north of here, drinking coffee from a vending machine, and thought about a poem that I'd written a few years ago that featured driving along an interstate and sipping vending machine coffee. I dug it off a backup CD. Looking at it from the vantage point I'm at now, it's almost disquieting.


She buzzes red traffic cones, scraping the fog on the highway.
Vended fake latté cools in the drink holder
And she muses on pavement and haze before her.

Driving is Zen, she'd said, koan jaunts to nowhere.
The Tao of Toyota no longer enlightens, though,
An unquiet mind chanting: wait brings more wait.

She sucks creamy acid dregs from the white paper cup
Studies the map for a new route to take,
  a back road,
   a country lane,
    a fourth interstate
Knowing that stasis holds nothing of comfort.

The cup empties and crumples and rolls in the back.
She swerves a half-degree, avoiding old roadkill
Then ratchets up the radio, searching for a different song.

So. I'm waiting today on a call from Tugrik's boss friend, but based on a phone message he left last night, it's going to be to tell me that the position is mutating into a lower-end QA position. I could still go out there for it--after all, I was considering heading out there to look for work without any guarantee of anything waiting, and the QA work will almost certainly be better than the $6.75 an hour the unemployment compensation equates to. On the flip side, I could stay here for the Largo position, which would be considerably more that that--albeit just for short term. Then I could head out to California in better financial shape.

Of course, the low-end QA position hasn't been offered to me, and the Largo position hasn't, either. If I turned down the first and didn't get the second, then I'd--be right where I am now.

I suppose the biggest worry I have is being a leech on friends. Either way I'm likely to be, though--if I'm unemployed, it doesn't matter whether I'm unemployed here or there, my crash space will be dependent on the generosity of friends. And even though "low-paying" in the SF Bay area equates to "moderately good-paying" out here, it probably wouldn't be enough for me to move into my own place--I can't presume Tugrik (or anyone else) would want a new quasi-permanent roommate!


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